Title: A Film, A Beginning
Author: CJ aka WritinginCT
Fandom: NCIS
Pairing: Gibbs/DiNozzo
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Slash
Categories: Character study, romance
Feedback: Love it? Hate it?
Disclaimer: I don’t own the recognizable characters I’m just inspired by them. Hopefully they’ve had fun playing in my sandbox.
Summary: A movie opens their eyes and its end gives them a beginning.
Status: Complete 2/28/08

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Gibbs had selected this little theater because it was on the other side of the city from his home and there would little chance of running into anyone he knew. He also knew that it was close to Tony's apartment and was a favorite of his, the old style seating and curtain framed screen a throwback to a long forgotten era that appealed to the old soul that resided in Tony. Gibbs would never admit it to himself but it was important somehow that he watch this movie in this particular theater, as if by watching it here that maybe he could somehow sense, or feel Tony there with him.

He had gone to the last showing of the night and found himself a seat at the far end of a row near the wall. He was trying to be inconspicuous. But his body language was screaming volumes about his discomfort level as he sat very straight with his eyes glued to the screen, even though the film had not even begun. He knew there were others in the theater, he could see them out of the corner of his eye and could hear them. And his attention was tempted to be pulled to a couple that had sat down two rows in front of him. The two men were a little younger than him, not by much though, and he struggled not to stare as they made themselves comfortable, one man with his arm around the other. They were talking to each other softly and he could tell that they had a level of ease and comfort with each other that only time could bring to a relationship. He felt an odd little twinge of jealousy in his chest that he couldn't explain. Or at least didn't want to explain because it would force him to admit things to himself that he just wasn't quite ready to yet.

The lights dimmed and the movie unfolded. He found himself pulled into the story from the start, and by the time the sex scene rolled around that had the media in a frenzy he was right there with them. He could understand the rough, raw urgency of their first drunken coupling, sometimes there was just no other way. And when they left that mountain, and had to go their opposite directions, his stomach knotted and he gritted his teeth in empathy. He watched as their lives went on, and how they had a twenty-year love affair comprised only of stolen moments that no one around them would ever accept or understand. The tears he refused to let flow started welling in his eyes as they were holding each other for what would be the last time. His hands were balled into fists as a life was taken on the screen in the most horrific of ways for the most hateful of reasons. He could feel the anguish on the screen down so deep inside of himself. And as a final promise was made in the the film, he made one to himself, that he would find a way some how, some way, to have the courage to admit to himself and to Tony that he loved him.

As the credits rolled he sat staring at his hands, trying not to look at the couple in front of him, although he couldn't keep himself from stealing little glances. One of the two was very emotional and the other was holding him and trying to comfort him. And just for a moment, the jealousy was back, because he wanted that. He wanted Tony with him there now, and the feel of his arms around him. He wanted Tony to be the one whispering soft words to make him feel better about the painful ending to the film, to give him hope again.

Eventually it was just the two men and Gibbs left as the theater emptied behind him. And still Gibbs sat there. He was trying to put some perspective on his rampant emotions. He was not normally a man of emotion. He always had a firm grip on his feelings, never letting them show. But as he sat there thinking about the film and the parallels to his own situation the tears that had been threatening to fall started to stream silently down his face.

He hastily scrubbed his face with his hands and stood to go, his eyes trained on his shoes. When he reached the final seat of his row he looked up, to see Tony standing there.

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Tony had gotten there just in time to find a seat as the film started. He had seen it once already with Abby of all people, but he wanted to watch it again and just let the power of the film just wash over him and take his emotions where it would. The theater had a dozen or couples and a odd single person here and there. He had found a seat and settled in. During one particularly bright scene on screen he looked around at the other movie goers and almost choked in surprise when there across the aisle from him was Gibbs.

Tony was torn between watching the movie and watching Gibbs. He somehow managed both, and he saw that Gibbs eyes never deviated from the screen. He had worked with Gibbs long enough to know that there were some serious emotions swirling behind that stony mask he had plastered on his face. He could see Gibbs fisted hands and the rage oozing out as the on screen beating went on and on. Tony saw Gibbs lips moving at the end as a promise to a lost love was made, and he wondered what Gibbs was promising and to whom.

After the credits rolled Tony could see the couple in front of Gibbs and he smiled at their obvious affection for each other. He also saw Gibbs trying not to look at them but failing in his efforts. Tony also saw a look of longing on Gibbs' face that almost broke Tony's heart. And it took all his self control not to bolt across the aisle when he saw the tears on the face of the man he had grown to love from afar.

He stood and waited at the end of his aisle, knowing Gibbs would see him as he left. He didn't know exactly what to say or what to do, all he knew was that it important that Gibbs know he was there. And he was right.

When Gibbs finally lifted his eyes as he reached the end of the aisle they first held a look of surprise, followed by a flash of that look of longing Tony had seen as Gibbs watched the other couple. And then, almost instinctively, Tony knew what to do, and without a word between them, he gave Gibbs a gentle smile and held his arms open.

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The moment his brain realized that it really was Tony standing in front of him the pain of wanting something he couldn't have hit him all over again. He tried to bite it back, but it was there. And now as he stood there in front of Tony who had his arms held out to him he almost panicked. But the part that needed Tony won out and he found himself stepping forward to be enfolded in those strong arms.

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Tony wasn't entirely sure what was going on with Gibbs. He had melted into Tony, which was totally unexpected. And as Gibbs hid his face in the crook of Tony's neck, Tony just held on tightly with one arm and cradled that familiar silver-haired head with the other. They just stood there for an eternity. The other two men were making their way out of the theater and they both gave Gibbs' shoulder a little rub of support and Tony a nod as they walked past.

He could feel Gibbs' breath become a little ragged and it took him a moment to realize that Gibbs was trying not to cry. And trying to mumble as he did it, “I don't want us to waste twenty years, Tony.”

It took Tony a moment to digest that and when he did, he loosened his embrace on Gibbs and pulled back a bit to take Gibbs' face in his hands, making the older man meet his eyes. The searching look that passed between them promised many things, most importantly, a beginning. And Tony whispered a vow, “We won't, Jethro, I promise. We won't.” And he sealed the promise with the gentlest of kisses.

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the end.

A/N: My little homage to the breathtaking and heartbreaking film, "Brokeback Mountain".