Special Agent Anthony Dinozzo Junior was a wild card, a big boy who hadn’t outgrown his frat boy days. Every Friday he would go out to the local bar, or club, and have a good time. “Good Time” meaning a few beers, shooting some pool and scoring a lady, two if he was real lucky. It was practically a ritual for the young NCIS agent, done more out of habit then want, or necessity. The routine was a comfort, a security in his ever-changing world; if he could pick up a lady at the end of a long work week then he was still worthwhile, a real person under all the crap.


Not this Friday night though, it had been a rough week of work, only hours ago his boss had been trapped in a car submerged under water for minutes on end, and when he finally was able to pull him out Gibbs’ eyes were glazed and he wasn’t breathing, he shivered as he remembered searching for a pulse and the thrill of dread that ran through him when he couldn’t find one. Gibbs’ had been so cold, and lifeless. He gripped the steering wheel tightly as he recalled how he had to administer CPR to his boss, to his only real father, the thought of losing Gibbs racing across his mind while it shouted at him to remain calm and count. He had driven past every club and bar in town and in neighboring towns but none of them seemed inviting, he knew deep down where he had to go but knew Gibbs wouldn’t be fond of someone checking in on him, yet the sight of his lifeless body had surged into the forefront of his mind and made him turn his vehicle around in an illegal U turn. And now he was sitting outside in his car, staring at Gibbs’ house wondering what would have happened had Gibbs died; he would never forgive himself. He had made that decision as he pulled away from Gibbs to work on Maddie; if Gibbs died it would’ve been his fault.


He stared at Gibbs the whole time he worked on Maddie, willing his boss to wake up, trying to somehow give both of them CPR at the same time. It was minutes later when they both were breathing and awake, and he kneeled in the middle of them gasping for air. His lungs burning, ice needles penetrating them, making it feel as if he were suffocating and not getting enough air. He breathed in deeply as he sat in the car wincing as the pain lanced through his chest and made him sit up straighter, reminding him to take slower, shorter and shallower breaths. He stared at the house, as he opened his car door, shut it and leaned against it; his heart beat wildly, as he shakily made his way across the street and up to the front door. It was two in the morning, Gibbs would most likely be sleeping, but he knew the front door would be open like it always was; he gave a fleeting thought to what Gibbs would say before pushing the door quietly open. As expected the house was pitch black, every light burned out, the quiet seemed to stretch for miles. His shoes didn’t seem to make a sound as they made their way across the wooden floor and to the bottom of the steps.


He considered waking his boss up, he knew he had to at least see him, but the idea of waking him this late after such an emotionally draining case didn’t seem like such a bright idea, even in DiNozzo land. He sighed as he reached Gibbs’ bedroom door that was left slightly open, listening he heard Gibbs’ breathing evenly in sleep. He slipped in and sat in the dressing chair across from the bed, he ran a hand down his face as he stared at the prone form lost in slumber. Tony sighed as he felt the knot in his chest loosen, a small whimper coming out, almost a keening noise. He thought of the man in the bed, and all he had done for him and the team. All the times he put his life in danger to save one of them, all the times he had been accused of murder and Gibbs hadn’t doubted him for one second. He stood up for him and backed him. He always came when he needed him the most. Gibbs always knew what he was thinking; Tony prided himself on being Gibbs’ protégé, knowing Gibbs saw his potential. Whenever he solved a case, put all the seemingly random pieces together the team seemed shocked at the insight he possessed but Gibbs just gave a small smile and put him in command.


Gibbs believed in Tony. He clasped his hands in front of his face as he tried to hold back the tears that swam in his eyes. His mind raced thinking of everything Gibbs had done for him, all the hidden compliments, the gentle worry and touch when he was injured or sick; the trust and confidence Gibbs had in him, the pride he had announced to him after reading his report. The constant support Gibbs gave him, he was the cornerstone of Tony’s existence, the very thing that kept him grounded, that motivated him to be the best person, and investigator he can possibly be. Gibbs listened to his senseless chatter, put up with his movie quotes and sometimes even joked with him. He looked down, feeling lost, he gave a pained sigh, rubbing his forehead.


“Dinozzo?” A voice said tiredly and curiously from the bed, Tony looked up unaware that Gibbs had awoken and sat up.


“Boss…” Tony trailed off, his voice gruff and pained; Gibbs just stared at him and sighed. Getting off the bed he padded out of the room, expecting DiNozzo to follow, minutes later they sat drinking beers, knee to knee, Gibbs watching Tony carefully, Tony watching the floor carefully.


“It’s two am Tony.” Gibbs stated.


“Never thought you one for stating the obvious boss.” Dinozzo said dryly, trying to find his sense of humor but his voice was so pained that it came out pitifully, with a dull sadness to it, he looked up into Gibbs’ icy blue eyes and gulped, “I couldn’t…I just….when….when I was eight my Father came into possession of these three foot swords. Japanese, My Mom thought they were pretty, she had a fascination with Japanese culture, she owned dresses, and every Saturday night she’d host a girls night that consisted of Japanese food, and some dancing after getting dressed up, make up and all, with all that Japanese crap. She was obsessed, never knew quite why, now that I think about it it’s a bit creepy, like she was worshiping some kind of god, the dances were weird like that too….”


“Dinozzo.” Gibbs stated flatly to get him back on track.


“Right. Well at the time our class was reading some odd boring third grade book, but I was reading treasure island, and the swords in my Father‘s study looked a lot like the ones in the book. I admired them for weeks on end, till my father walked in on me staring at them one day. He cuffed me on the side of my head and dragged me to my room, shaking me he told me I wasn‘t to touch them.” Gibbs frowned as Tony went on, he seemed to hesitate before pushing through, “Well, you know me boss, I wanted to just hold one, not play just hold. So one night I sneaked out of my room when everybody was asleep, or so I thought. I forgot that my Father was getting back from a business trip that night. I walked in, and pulled the chair over to the glass case. I tried picking the lock like I saw in the movies, that didn‘t work so I just took the glass off it‘s hinges. I had one of those babies in my hands before Midnight.”


“Your Father walked in.” Gibbs stated He nodded.


“Yeah the moment he saw me with that sword he lost it. He yanked it out of my hands and took off his belt.” His voice wavered as he buried his hands in his hair, breathing heavily, wincing, and cringing; Gibbs leaned forward so they were only inches apart, his icy blue stare pierced through Tony who looked back at Gibbs desperately, like a caged animal. “He whipped me. First time.”


“But not the last.” Gibbs whispered hoarsely. Tony just shook his head, as he watched Gibbs swallow dryly, his face tightened, and his eyes took on a fierce protective anger.


“I mean…I don‘t know….at first I thought it was my fault, I did everything I was told, I tried being like him but no matter what, it was never good enough for him. I was never good enough; he tried to beat me into line. But I guess I was just too screwed up.” He said quietly, his voice choking over a hard lump in his throat. Everything went silent, Gibbs studying Dinozzo as he sat hunched into himself, Tony tried putting himself back together but he couldn’t. “Boss…I can’t. I can’t do it anymore.”


“Do what Tony?” He said softly.


“Put myself together. Today on the docks….you just laying there….and I couldn’t…you were dead. You were dead.” Tony gasped out, tears at the corners of his eyes.


“I’m here now.” Gibbs said gruffly.


“You didn’t see you. I thought…..you were the only one, Boss, who ever believed in me, who ever thought I was worth something, you didn’t think I was useless, worthless, stupid, incompetent…..You taught me everything I know…..You’ve always been there…..and when I saw you lying there dead today…..” His voice cracked tears sliding down his cheeks, “I realized that I thought of you as my Father, my Dad.”


Gibbs breathed in deeply, pride rising in his chest. He put a hand on Tony’s shoulder and squeezed.
“I almost lost you today Boss. I don’t want to go through that again. I don’t ever want to have to choose between you and someone else again.”


“You did the right thing Dinozzo.” Gibbs said


“Yeah. You want to know something though?” He said looking at Gibbs warily


“Lay it on me.” He said


“I didn’t do it for you; save Maddie, or cause it was my job.” He said cautiously.


“Then why?” Gibbs asked


“I did it for Kelly.” He answered quietly, in a whisper; Gibbs just stared at him, before drawing him into a fierce hug.


“Oh Tony.” Gibbs whispered, feeling a warmth blossom in his chest right next to the pride he felt. Tony had saved Maddie not for him, but for Kelly, because He, Gibbs, loved Kelly.


“I’m sorry Boss.” He whispered brokenly.


“Don’t you dare.” Gibbs whispered back fiercely, patting the back of his head. “Maddie asked me today what Kelly would be like if she had lived. I said like her. If I had a son, scratch that I do have a son. You.”


Tony pulled back, Gibbs looked at him the protectiveness shined ten times brighter in them, he gulped knowing he was really and truly Gibbs’ now. “So Tony where does your Father live? Don’t make me wake up McGee or call Trent Kort to get his information.”


He smiled and went to reply but ended up coughing, giving a short, raspy cry of pain at the end of the fit, putting a hand to his chest he tried to repress the pain, Gibbs got off the couch, and grabbed Tony’s arm. Gently guiding him to the couch, he told Tony to get comfortable as he went for a blanket. Sure enough Tony had stripped to his undershirt and boxers with socks on by the time he came back with a wet, cool wash cloth and a blanket and pillow. He threw the pillow at Dinozzo, as he unfolded the blanket and threw it over Tony who was too busy feeling like crap to say anything wise. Putting the cold wash cloth on his head, Gibbs rested a hand on his forehead, Tony looked up at him a question in his eyes, Gibbs just smiled sadly, leaned down and gave him one of his kisses he usually reserved for Abby, before he head slapped him.


“What was that for?!” He protested loudly with a smile on his face.


“Diving in after me and getting sick! You could have died Dinozzo!” Gibbs said sternly, worry evident in his posture. Tony beckoned him back down, he was surprised when he was head slapped by his Second in Command.


“That was for driving off the end of a dock, dying on me and everybody else who cares about you and all without saying a single thing to us!” Tony scolded before settling back down. Gibbs patted his cheek smirking as he turned and walked to the wall, turning the lights off he said, “Tony, you are worth so much more than your Father made out. He’s the one that’s messed up. You are irreplaceable, and an asset to the team, and personally I am proud to have you call me Father, and to have you as a son. You are mine now. Understood?”


“Yes sir bossman sir!” Tony said, before coughing and groaning in pain, slapping the doorway Gibbs smiled making his way back up to his room.