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Tony had gone into work very, very early Monday morning. He really wanted to research Claudia's ex-husband and find out all that he could about him. He decided to start with Claudia's service record, which caused a rush of pride to warm over him as he read about her accomplishments and commendations. He found the link to the police report and finally had a face to put with her ex-husband's name.
The photo could have been one of any Marine Tony had seen in his career at NCIS but he studied this one carefully, as if trying to get a handle on the man just from his photo. Rick Grogan was a slender, wiry man. His face was thin and sharply angular, topped by non-descript brown hair in the traditional high and tight that stamped him as a Marine. His eyes bothered Tony. Grayish blue they were cold, like ice and they made Tony wary. This was not a man to be trusted.
Rick was black ops. And it was because of that status that he only received a slap on the wrist and ordered to anger management counseling after the MP's had arrested him and Claudia took out the restraining order. The powers that be attributed his behavior to the stress of the job.
Currently Rick was listed as being assigned to Norfolk, not an uncommon thing for the black ops boys. And Tony knew that didn't necessarily mean that Rick was actually in Norfolk. But it was too close for his liking. Tony read everything and processed it all away in his head. He was angry. How a man could have everything, a beautiful wife who gave up a career she loved to be with him and a new son, and throw it all away. Now he understood why Gibbs got so angry when they saw men throw away their families in stupidity.
He thought about Gibbs and how much he had lost when his wife and daughter died. The protective feelings and more for Claudia and Joshua that were starting to grow in him couldn't be anything in comparison to what Gibbs had felt for his wife and daughter. Still felt for his wife and daughter. A new understanding of how Gibbs ticked came to Tony, something he had never understood because he had never been a parent.
Tony closed out all the computer windows, hiding the basic traces of his efforts. He stood up and stretched and went over to the window, watching the city getting to work, lost in his thoughts. Tony wondered to himself about what actually made a good father. His own was distant and they weren't close. He didn't want to be that kind of a father he knew that much. He had to admit to himself that secretly he had gotten a kick out of people calling him Joshua's dad on Saturday. And he realized in surprise that it hadn't even been two months since Claudia and Joshua had wormed their way into his life, and more importantly, his heart. And he knew that he would protect them, and keep them safe. Because if nothing else, he knew that was something fathers were supposed to do.
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McGee had volunteered to run to the deli and pick up their lunch order and when he got back to the NCIS parking lot he pulled his car in next to Tony's. After grabbing the bag of sandwiches and locking his car he turned to walk back to the building when he did a double take at what he saw in the back seat of Tony's car.
Hurrying back into the building and heading straight for Abby's lab he almost couldn't control his mirth.
Taking one look at his expression Abby squinted at him and demanded, "Okay. What do you know that I don't know?"
"Tony has a booster seat in the backseat of his car." McGee blurted out unable to contain his laughter any longer.
Abby's eyes grew huge, "No way. Why would he have a booster seat? He doesn't even like kids. Or actually I guess I should say that kids don't like him."
"I don't know. Maybe he's got a new girlfriend we don't know about."
"Not nice, McGee. That would mean two members of the team keeping secrets."
"You mean Gibbs?"
"Yeah. For weeks now he's been weirding everyone out by being nice. He's got to be seeing someone too. He was as grumpy as a grizzly bear when he and Colonel Mann split then all of a sudden he did a complete about face. One of the night shift guys said he even played coffee cup football with them in the bullpen the other night. And you saw him buying flowers remember? Definitely not normal Gibbs behavior."
"Yeah. Well I guess they'll tell us when they're ready."
"McGee! That could take forever. I want to know now."
"What do you want to do? Follow them?" Regretting his words instantly upon seeing the evil little glint in Abby's eyes he protested, "Forget it, Abby. I like my job. Not to mention breathing. We'll just have to wait and see."
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Claudia called him Wednesday afternoon while he was sitting at his desk. "Hi, Tony."
"Hey. You sound horrible. What's wrong?" he was concerned. She sounded tired and half-dead.
"Joshua picked up an intestinal bug and has throwing up in between bouts of diarrhea for two days. And now I've got it."
Tony made a face, being sick like that was never any fun. And then to top off having to care for a sick child too couldn't help. "Have you seen a doctor?"
"Yeah, I took Joshua yesterday. They want to just let it run its course. And he's starting to perk back up already. But I'm wilting. So I don't think we'd be good company tonight. Sorry."
Tony was supposed to be joining them for dinner and a dvd later, "Hey, nothing to be sorry about. Do you need anything?"
"Just my bed. I'll try and go to the store tomorrow and get groceries."
"You sure? "
"Yeah. Sorry about tonight. I was looking forward to it."
"Me too. Call me if you need anything, okay?"
"Okay."
Tony hung up the phone thinking about how tired she sounded. And he had caught something else too in her tone too. He couldn't quite figure out how to label it but it bothered him. He decided to check on her and Joshua and do some mother henning. And he decided not to analyze where exactly that was coming from. He was not the mother hen type.
He jotted a quick list of things to pick up at the store that he thought she might need and then realized he hadn't a clue what to get for a sick child. Stymied he headed down to Autopsy to pick Ducky's brain.
Glad to see that Jimmy wasn't with Ducky, Tony walked over to where Ducky was standing examining a body. "Hey Ducky."
"Oh, Anthony. To what do I owe the honor of your company?"
"Can I ask your advice on something without everyone else finding out?"
Ducky turned to face Tony, "Most assuredly, Anthony. How may I assist you?"
"I, ah, well, I've sort of been seeing someone."
Ducky took in Tony's reluctance to say that and was surprised. Tony was not normally reticent in expounding on his conquests. He didn't say anything and simply waited for Tony to continue.
"And, uh, she has a five-year old son."
Now that surprised Ducky and he looked up expectantly to Tony, encouraging him to go on with what he had to say.
"Anyway, Duck, they both came down with some sort of intestinal bug and aren't feeling so hot. She took him to the doctor yesterday and they just want to let it run its course. I want to stop on the way home and pick up some stuff at the store but I don't have a clue what to get for a sick five-year old and was hoping you could point me in the right direction."
Ducky took in Tony's demeanor and it didn't take a profiler to determine that this was very important to Tony. They talked for a time and with the list of things Ducky recommended tucked safely in his pocket Tony headed back up to the bullpen. He didn't hear Ducky comment to the corpse, "It's about time that boy got a family of his own."
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Tony made Claudia cry for the first time when he bought her toilet paper.
He had taken his lists and went to the grocery store and then made a special trip halfway across town to a little, hole-in-the-wall Italian restaurant and picked up dinner for the three of them.
Bags in hand he knocked on Claudia's door. He could hear the muffled sound of the television and after a long moment he heard shuffling on the other side of the door. A little voice asked, "Who is it?"
"Joshua, it's Tony. Can you open the door for me?" He was a little concerned that Claudia herself didn't answer the door.
He heard Joshua telling Claudia who was at the door and then heard the turning the lock and the deadbolt and finally the door was open. He walked in with his bags just as Claudia made her way out from the bedroom. She looked awful. He headed for the kitchen as she said, "Tony what are you doing here?"
"Checking on you guys." She was a little wobbly on her feet in the kitchen doorway and he pulled out a chair and pulled her over to it. Joshua seemed a little subdued but he didn't quite look as much like death warmed over as Claudia did. He left Tony to his mother and went back to his cartoon.
"What is all this?" she asked, gesturing towards the bags.
"I stopped and picked up some stuff I thought you might need."
On the top of the first bag was a package of ultra premium toilet paper and he tried to get her to smile as he handed her the toilet paper, "For you madam, the Rolls Royce of toilet paper." She clutched the package to her chest and just looked at him in confusion.
Tony pulled the rest of his purchases out of the bag and efficiently put the cold stuff in the fridge and started rattling off, "Juice boxes, so Joshua can grab one himself without spilling anything. Sugar-free popsicles which, although are fun I'll admit, are merely a sneaky way of keeping you both hydrated. Sherbet for when you're feeling at least a little bit better. This pedia-whatchacallit stuff for Joshua so his little electrolytes don't get all screwy. Oyster crackers, much more fun to eat than saltines, but they do the same job. And from the pharmacy we've got the pink stuff and the clear stuff both of which claim to help. I have several girly type magazines for you, and a couple new awesome coloring books for Joshua. And last but not least, three quarts of the best chicken noodle soup in the city from my favorite Italian restaurant."
She stood up still clutching the toilet paper like a teddy bear and took in all he had brought and her face just crumpled and she couldn't stop the tears.
It was not exactly the reaction he had expected and he just closed the gap between them and enveloped her, toilet paper and all, in his arms. "Hey now. What's this?"
She clasped a hand over her mouth to try and contain the sobs but they snuck out anyway. He just squeezed her tighter, really not knowing what to do, and he heard her trying to say something through the sobs.
"It's so hard sometimes. And it's always just me. And I try so hard. But it's just me. All the time, it's just me. And you bought me toilet paper." A fresh round of hiccupy sobs cancelled out anything else that she might have wanted to say. But he got it. He understood. She was exhausted and sick yet there was no one else to help. She had to try and take of Joshua regardless. No one should have that much weight on their shoulders. And yet she did it normally with a smile. But she deserved someone to take care of her too.
They stood there for a long time and he just held her tight and gently rubbed her back, letting her get out all the tears. He finally said gently, "C'mon. I think you need a hot shower and your bed. I'll take care of things tonight."
She let him lead her to the bathroom where he started the hot spray and helped her peel off her sweat dampened t-shirt and sweat pants. While she was under the water he went in her room in search of clean pajamas for her. He poked through her dresser and found clean underwear and a fresh t-shirt and sweatpants. Something bothered him as he looked through her dresser and he opened the rest of the drawers to be sure he was right. She had absolutely no lingerie. Not even a white cotton nightgown. Everything was t-shirts and sweats or flannel pants. He decided that it had been entirely too long since anyone had pampered Claudia, since anyone treated her like a woman, since anyone had just cared about her. That thought somehow made him all the angrier at her ex-husband.
He closed up the drawers and brought her the clean clothes in the bathroom. She got dressed and he tucked her into bed. He sat with her for a minute and stroked her damp hair, "Get some sleep. Joshua will be fine with me. You don't have to worry tonight okay?"
Her eyes were already drooping when she asked, "Why did you come tonight?"
Tony leaned down and gave her a light kiss on her forehead and stood up, he smoothed the hair away from her face a final time and said quietly, "You're supposed to take care of the ones you love when they're sick, it's some sort of rule I think. Get some sleep."
He turned off the light and pulled the door shut so she could really rest. He made his way out to the living room which was a disaster area. He did a quick recon of the situation and realized that the kitchen was in similar shape as was Joshua.
"Hey, squirt."
"Is Mummy sleeping?"
"Yeah. She doesn't feel so good. So it's just you an me. Are you hungry? I brought some of the best chicken noodle soup. It's my favorite."
"I like noodles." Joshua said and followed Tony into the kitchen.
Tony opened a container of soup and dipped a pinky in, deciding it was hot enough still he portioned some out into a couple of bowls and put them on a tray with a couple of juice boxes. He gave Joshua the box of oyster crackers, "Here, squirt, you're in charge of these." He picked up the tray and into the living room they went.
Joshua picked out a new cartoon and had soon settled himself down In front of his soup on the coffee table. Tony was sitting next to him, although on the couch, and the two ate and laughed at the cartoon. Tony finished eating and leaned back on the couch to get comfortable when he realized his holster was poking into his side. Crap. He had not wanted Joshua to see his gun. He hoped the long shirt he was wearing over it had hidden it from view.
He casually got up and went into the kitchen and unclipped the holster from his belt and pulled the clip from the Sig, and stretching to reach he hid it the little cupboard above the refrigerator. He felt confident that Joshua would have no way of getting to it there. And he made a mental note to buy a little gun safe for Claudia's front closet. But for tonight this would have to do.
Returning to the living room he noted that Joshua had eaten most of his soup, well at least the noodles and chicken anyway. The little boy definitely needed a change of pajamas. And a bath Tony decided. And wasn't that just entirely new territory. He had never bathed a child in his life. Now what?
Joshua was more than willing to have a bath and he led the way. They had a great time playing with his fleet in the tub and Tony got him dried off and dressed in a clean pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. He had hunted for clean pajamas but there were none to be found and Tony realized that if Joshua had been ill the last couple of days that they were probably all in the hamper. He decided it didn't matter. Josh was clean and comfortably dressed, that was what really mattered.
They spent some time with his toys in the living room and sitting there surrounded by blocks, superheroes, and trucks Tony realized that this was another one of his "little moments" and he took a mental picture.
Joshua was engrossed in another dvd with a little bowl of sherbet and Tony took the opportunity to try and tidy up the kitchen. He got the dishwasher started and wiped down the counters. That done he slipped down the hall and stuck his head in to check on Claudia. She was sleeping and the light from the hallway let Tony see how relaxed she looked. He took another mental picture.
Tony noticed Joshua drooping and declared it bedtime. Joshua surprisingly went without protest. Apparently bedtime involved an entire ritual for Joshua that involved particular action figures, a particular stuffed dog, and a particular story that needed to be read. Finally Joshua was tucked in, story was read and Tony was about to stand up from where he was sitting on the bed when Joshua wrapped his arms around him and declared, "I love you, Tony."
Tony had to get out of that room. Get out before Joshua could see what that little declaration did to him, before he could see that Tony had tears welling in his eyes. He gave Joshua a big squeeze and spoke from his heart, "I love you too, squirt. Now go to sleep." He planted a kiss on the top of Joshua's head and turning off the light, he left the room.
Tony collapsed into the corner of the couch. The television was off and the room was quiet. He tried to process what had just happened between him and Joshua. Tony had had people, well, women mostly, tell him that they loved him. But this was different. He had never understood the concept of unconditional love before, but that was what this was. It had to be, there was no other definition that Tony could come up with to describe it. And as he sat there in the middle of Joshua's disaster area of toys with the sticky sherbet bowl on the table he felt like the king of the world, or at least the king of this little world.
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tbc...feedback is sucked up by the author like Gibbs and his coffee
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.