Tony walked away from Ziva, heading back to Joe and Levon. His conversation with her had gone better than he’d expected.
He could have let all that had happened before he’d left slide---just sweep it under the rug like it didn’t matter, made nice, smiled and accepted whatever explanation or excuse Ziva was prepared to offer and let it go. It wasn’t like he hadn’t done it before; hell, he’d been doing it for most of his time at NCIS. But like his conversation in Houston with Gibbs, Tony opted not to back down. He choose to bring up things that at the time he’d simply tolerated or outright ignored, things he’d made allowances and justifications for because he worked with them, considered them friends and allies.
Tony wasn’t willing to do that any more. He couldn’t help but wonder if things would have turned out differently if he hadn’t been willing to do it then. What would have happened if he’d taken a hard line---if he’d refused to tolerate the head slaps, if he’d never apologized to Ziva, if he’d told McGee to stuff his crap about Tony not being a real team leader, if he’d called Abby on her shrine to Gibbs and how it made him feel.
Tony shook his head. There was no way to know, so it wasn’t worth dwelling on much. What Tony did know was that in Houston, things were different. He wasn’t certain if it was because the team there was different or if it was him who was different. Either way, he was still confident that his life there was better. He was on equal footing there with his coworkers there; he was liked and respected. He hadn’t lied to Ziva when he said he was happy.
Ziva’s apology had been genuine. She hadn’t been sorry for anything said or done at the time, but hindsight had given her a new perspective, much the same way it had for Tony. It was nice to hear her say there was a lot she’d have done differently. There was a lot Tony would have changed too, if given a chance. Unfortunately, the only option was to move forward.
He hoped she’d follow up and actually visit him in Houston. It would be nice if they could establish a friendship that didn’t revolve around the job and maintaining a working relationship. They might actually be completely honest with one another this time; they might even find the common ground Tony suspected existed and was far broader than their previous interactions suggested.
Tony would love to show Ziva around his new city. Ziva thought DC was completely different from her homeland, Houston might seem like Mars to her. Joe certainly thought it was like being on another planet when he first moved there.
“Everything okay, Slick?” Levon asked, bringing Tony’s attention back to his present location.
Tony smiled at his friend. “Everything is just fine, Cowboy.”
Joe looked him over, checking the veracity of that statement for himself. Tony knew it wasn’t because Joe didn’t trust him. It was more like he didn’t always trust Tony’s definition of ‘fine’. That wasn’t without good reason so Tony wasn’t bothered by his cousin’s perusal.
“Fornell will be here in two minutes,” Gibbs said.
He looked annoyed. Tony thought it might be a byproduct of being delayed in questioning Jeanne. It wasn’t like Gibbs had ever been a patient man. But when blue eyes fixed on Tony, he knew it was more than just the delay that was responsible for that look.
“Fornell doesn’t want you anywhere near her, Tony.” Gibbs tone was almost contrite.
Tony bit back the first thing that came to mind. He didn’t think cursing would help. And regardless of how they wanted to play it, right now it was still Fornell and the FBI’s show.
Tony took a slow, deep breath, rubbing a hand over his face. If he was honest with himself, he wasn’t sure he was prepared to see her again anyway…even through one way glass. Earlier he’d wanted to apologize to her, to say something that might make amends for everything that happened between them. With a quiet sigh, Tony realized there wasn’t anything he really could say. He was sorry he’d hurt her, but at the time he thought he was doing the right thing. He hadn’t lied when he said he’d loved her, but Tony doubted that would carry much weight---especially if she didn’t believe him. And since she was accusing him of murder, it was highly unlikely she would believe anything other the worst about him.
“Tony?” Joe laid a hand on his shoulder.
Tony blinked. “I’m okay.”
Joe snorted. “Try again.”
“I’ll be okay.” It didn’t hurt as much as it had just a few days ago when he’d first heard Gibbs say Jeanne had accused him of murdering her father. Maybe in a few more days it would hurt even less.
Joe smiled, giving his shoulder a reassuring squeeze. “I will watch the interrogation.”
“I know.” It was heartening to know Joe would keep an eye on things. His cousin always had Tony’s well being as his primary focus.
“I will find out the truth, DiNozzo.” Gibbs made it sound like a promise.
“Never had any doubts on that score, Gibbs.” Tony smirked. Gibbs was the best he’d ever seen when it came to interrogation. The man hadn’t missed a trick in all the time Tony had known him. Even agreeing to go easy on Jeanne, Tony was confident Gibbs could get her to tell the truth.
Tony found himself at a loss as to what to do with himself. He wasn’t allowed to watch the interrogation, there were no leads to follow up on, no paperwork to file, no facts to check. Tony shifted his weight restlessly. It felt decidedly odd to have nothing to do on a floor where he used to log up to fifteen hours a day when working a case. It was another difference which highlighted how much had changed.
“Maybe I’ll just…” Tony sighed, racking his brain for something before settling on, “go talk to Ducky.”
Ducky wasn’t assigned anything with the case. He should be in the morgue. And Tony wouldn’t mind seeing his friend face to face. Of all his old teammates, Ducky had always been the easiest to talk to.
“You want company?”
Judging by Levon’s expression his offer wasn’t about keeping an eye on Tony, it was just a friendly question. He would take ‘no’ for an answer if Tony wanted to be alone with Ducky. Tony was increasingly glad Levon had come along.
Tony smiled. “I think you’d like Ducky.”
“He’s the older feller…the one with the long stories, right?”
“Yeah.”
“Can we get a cup o’ coffee before we go?” Levon grinned. “Don’t think my falling asleep on him would make for a very good impression.”
Tony chuckled. “Probably not.” Although knowing Ducky, the older man had experienced his audience drifting off at least once before.
“Call me when you’re done,” Levon said to Joe.
Joe gave him a two finger salute. “Will do, Cowboy.”
Tony wasn’t sure what to make of the look Gibbs gave him as he headed for the break room with Levon. He got the impression Gibbs might be trying to gauge if the conversation with Ziva had changed Tony’s mind about coming back to NCIS. There was a time when Gibbs would have known…or maybe it was just Tony’s belief that Gibbs knew everything that had him confessing to things or giving away his thoughts without the other man having to put forth much effort.
Like the first time he’d actually voiced any criticism of Gibbs, Tony winced as he realized Gibbs was some how less than he remembered. Even heroes have feet of clay, Tony thought with a mental grimace. And Gibbs had been his hero, his idol. He was someone Tony had looked up to and had emulated. Then Gibbs had run off to Mexico and things changed; the pedestal Tony had Gibbs on wasn’t nearly as lofty as it had once been. Tony wasn’t sure if that meant they were now on equal footing or not. He shook his head, deciding that it didn’t really matter.
Tony stepped into the break room, not surprised to find it empty. It usually was except around lunchtime. Tony poured a cup of coffee for Levon, offering it to the other man before pouring one for himself.
Levon gave the cup a dirty look after taking a sip. “People really like this shit?”
“No.” Tony laughed. “Mostly they drink it out of desperation.”
“It’s weaker than well water.” Levon eyed the half empty pot. “I could make•“
“I don’t think that would be a good idea, Cowboy.” The only one who liked Levon’s coffee was Levon. Well, Gibbs might like it, but Tony doubted anyone else could stand to drink it. The stuff currently available might be crap but at least it wasn’t strong enough to dissolve a spoon.
“We’ll get a cup of the real stuff later,” Tony offered when Levon still looked like he might be seriously considering actually brewing a new pot.
Levon sighed. “Yeah, okay.”
They headed down to the morgue. Until meeting Ducky, Tony had hated morgues and autopsies. Other coroners he’d worked with treated a body as little more than a carcass, as though they’d never been living, breathing people at all. Maybe the distance was necessary for them to do the job, but Tony never felt comfortable seeing a person stripped so completely of their humanity. And he really hated the idea that some day his remains might be treated the same way.
Ducky, on the other hand, managed to treat the dead as though they were still people. He was always respectful, even gentle. It went a long way toward making Tony more comfortable with the idea of corpses in general and autopsies in particular. It was decidedly reassuring to know the job could be done without the man doing it being callous or cold.
The pneumatic doors opened automatically for them. Ducky was at his desk having a cup of tea. Tony was glad they weren’t interrupting an autopsy. He didn’t really want to get in the way of a case or pull Ducky away from something important.
“Hey, Ducky.”
“Anthony!” Ducky immediately got up from his desk, his smile bright and welcoming. “So good to see you, my dear boy.”
He held out a hand, and Tony found himself taking it, using it to pull the older man into a hug. In all the time he’d worked at NCIS, he’d never hugged Ducky, but it felt right to do so now.
“It is good to see you too, Ducky,” Tony said, meaning every word. Ducky was the only one of his old teammates he’d stayed in touch with---albeit mostly via infrequent e-mails. The older man was the only one he thought might understand why he’d left, and didn’t judge him too harshly for it. He was the only one who thought Tony had done a decent job while Gibbs was in Mexico. He’d given Tony a stellar recommendation while staying quiet about where Tony had gone. Ducky at least thought Tony’s skill and ability as a detective were worth something, and was a good enough friend to respect his wishes.
Ducky stepped back, blue eyes giving Tony a thorough once over. “You are looking well.”
“Thanks.” Tony grinned. “So are you.”
He waved Levon forward, patting him on the shoulder. “Ducky, this is my very good friend of mine, Levon Lundy. Levon, this is my good friend, Dr. Donald Mallard.”
“Dr. Mallard,” Levon held out his hand, “it’s a pleasure to meet you in person.”
“Video conferences might be convenient but they are no substitute for the real thing. And please call me Ducky, everyone does.” Ducky smiled, shaking Levon’s hand.
“Tony’s told me a lot about you.”
Ducky arched an eyebrow. “I can only hope he had nothing but good things to say.”
“Told me you were the best in the business.” Levon’s declaration was very matter of fact.
Tony chuckled when he saw a bit of color appear in Ducky’s cheeks. Who know he’d be embarrassed by an honest compliment?
Ducky’s smile turned shy. “A bit of an exaggeration, my good man.”
“If you can’t brag about your friends, who can you brag about?” Levon grinned.
“Quite right.” Ducky positively beamed, clearly pleased to be considered Tony’s friend. “Shall I tell you about some of Anthony’s exploits?”
Levon’s grin got wider, and Tony hung his head. “I should have known getting you to together would be a bad idea.”
“Don’t worry, Slick, he can’t have any more embarrassing stories about you than Joe’s got.”
“Wouldn’t bet on that,” Tony muttered. At least Joe knew better than to tell too much knowing full well Tony had stories of his own he could retaliate with. Tony didn’t have the same ammunition when it came to Ducky or Levon for that matter.
“Slick?” Ducky cocked his head, bright eyes inquisitive. “An odd nickname.”
“Not like Ducky is all that common,” Levon observed with a bemused smile.
“Yes, well, with my last name it rather makes sense.”
The next logical question would naturally be where Levon had come up with Tony’s nickname. It was one Tony wouldn’t mind getting a definitive answer to himself. He wasn’t entirely sure Levon would tell him the truth if he asked outright---the blond would more likely just tease him about it than tell him the truth. But if Ducky asked, the respect for his elders Levon’s grandmother had worked hard to instill in him might be enough to get the real reason out of him, so Tony was hoping Ducky would ask.
Unfortunately, instead of focusing on Levon, the older man turned his attention back to Tony. “I’d love to hear about how you are doing in Houston, my boy. You’re e-mails have been rather brief. You’d mentioned your partner, but really told me little more than his name. And you never did tell me if you’d found a place of your own or how you made out in your quest for another classic car.”
There was no censure in Ducky’s voice, only honest curiosity. It was refreshing to have someone from his old team take an interest in his life as it was now rather than launch into trying convince him he should give it up and come back to NCIS.
“Perhaps that is too personal,” Ducky back-peddled, obviously reading more in Tony’s momentary hesitation than he’d intended. “It really is none of my•“
“I’m just trying to figure out where to start, Ducky.” Tony quickly reassured him. “There’s a lot of ground to cover. This might take awhile.”
“Oh, yes, I hadn’t thought of that.” Ducky shook his head. “Forgive me, I didn’t think you might be short on time.”
“Got plenty of time Ducky,” Tony smiled. He had no idea how long interrogating Jeanne would take. Fornell had told him not to leave town. It wasn’t like he had to be anywhere, and he missed talking to Ducky.
“I was thinking we might want to get more comfortable.”
Ducky chuckled. “Let me get another chair.”
Author's Chapter Notes:
Tony talks to Ducky.