“Agent Gibbs, my name is Dr. Winesett. I’m the chief of trauma and I’m overseeing Agent DiNozzo’s surgery. You are listed as his next of kin, so I thought I would call you and let you know how things are progressing.”
Gibbs took a deep breath and then blew it out in an effort to tamp down the nausea that was plaguing him. The doctor had said that he was going to tell him how things were progressing; that meant that Tony was still alive and still fighting. “I’d appreciate that,” the team leader replied, his voice radiating more confidence than he felt.
“Agent DiNozzo as you know was brought in with multiple gun shot wounds; one to his shoulder, a graze on his side, and he took two bullets in his back.”
He closed his eyes struggling to block the image of the bleeding man out of his mind. It was no use. Gibbs knew that he would never be able to forget the look in Tony’s pain filled eyes. “I’m aware of that,” he said.
“Well, the graze to his side was deep,” Dr. Winesett continued. “Despite the number of stitches that it required, the damage was minimal. He’ll be uncomfortable for a while, but that is the least of our concerns.”
“Meaning what?”
“The bullet in his shoulder nicked an artery and in turn, he lost a lot of blood. One of our vascular surgeons has been able to remove the bullet and repair the artery, but the bullet was deep and the damage to his muscles was extensive. It will take some intensive physical therapy, but he should regain full function of that shoulder and arm.”
Gibbs licked his parched lips. “He told me that he couldn’t feel his legs. The uh…bullets that he took in the back, did they…” The team leader couldn’t bear to even utter the words. He was thankful that Dr. Winesett seemed to be able to understand his question.
“Right now, all I can tell you is that the two bullets that entered his back have done a great deal of damage not only to his spinal cord, but to some of his internal organs as well. We’re just now getting to the point where we can concentrate on his other injuries; our first priority was his shoulder because of the danger of him bleeding out.
“His vitals are weak and erratic. I’m not sure how much longer I can risk keeping him in surgery. We may have to give his body a little time to recover before we can even begin to assess the damage to his spine.”
That was not the answer that Gibbs wanted to hear. He wanted to know now, right this moment, if Tony was going to be able to walk again and Dr. Winesett was not supplying him with the answers that he needed to hear. Gibbs wanted the doctor to tell him that everything was fine and that DiNozzo’s spinal cord wasn’t damaged beyond repair and that his senior field agent was going to walk out of the hospital on his own free will.
“There’s nothing else you can tell me right now?” Gibbs pressed.
“No, I’m sorry,” Winesett apologized. “When Agent DiNozzo is in recovery, I’ll come and find you. Hopefully, I’ll know a little more by then.”
“You better know a lot more, Doc,” Gibbs growled, hanging up the phone in one fluid motion. He leaned his forehead against the wall and began to clench and unclench his fist. The team leader knew that he shouldn’t have taken his irritation at himself out on Dr. Winesett, but the frustration of not knowing was eating away at him. “Damn it,” he muttered under his breath.
“Jethro?” Ducky called to him. “Jethro, what did the doctor say?”
Gibbs relayed what little information he knew to his friend. Ducky hung onto every word, sometimes asking questions that he wished he had thought to ask. Pushing himself off the wall, he began to pace in front of the nurse’s station. “The doctor said that the two bullets that entered Tony’s back have done a lot of damage to his spine and to some of his internal organs. They really didn’t know anything else.”
“I would venture to say that there is a substantial amount of swelling around his spinal cord and that until the swelling goes down, it may be difficult to ascertain the damage,” the ME deduced. “The doctors here are among the best in the nation; I’m sure that they will do everything they can for Tony.”
Gibbs merely nodded at Ducky’s attempt at consolation. “I need some air,” he finally mumbled.
“Do you want some company?”
“No. Stay here in case…in case the doctor comes by. I won’t be gone long.”
Gibbs didn’t wait for elevator to arrive. He needed to get outside and into the cool evening air. Taking the steps two at a time, he barely cleared the door before he found himself kneeling on the ground, losing the contents of his stomach. His retching quickly turned into dry heaves and it was more than a few minutes before he could muster the strength to stand.
Finally pushing himself up off the ground, he slowly made his way over to an empty picnic table. He sat down, his hands cradling his now aching head. Why couldn’t he just wake up from this nightmare? If he could only go back in time and do things differently, maybe Tony wouldn’t be in surgery fighting for his life.
How could he have let this happen? He should have learned his lesson with Ari. That particular obsession had cost Kate her life and now he had to face the possibility of losing Tony because he had lost his objectivity on this last case. He had allowed his personal feelings to cloud his judgment, something that he should not have permitted. Gibbs could only hope that someday Tony would be able to forgive him.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
McGee pulled the truck into its customary parking space and cut off the engine. He glanced over at Ziva who was still staring out the window. They had not spoken since leaving the crime scene, each content to be left alone with their own thoughts. Now they were back at work and had to acknowledge a reality that they had yet to accept themselves.
“Ready to go inside?” he asked, shattering the silence between them.
Ziva’s gaze remained fixed. “Not really.”
“Me neither,” McGee admitted.
“I can not stop thinking about what happened.”
“I know what you mean.”
McGee didn’t think that he would ever be able to forget the sight of Tony’s blood staining the asphalt. He and Ziva had arrived as DiNozzo was being loaded into the ambulance; the urgency in the paramedic’s voices told the agents that their friend’s condition was grave. Neither of them knew what happened and Gibbs didn’t seem to be able or willing to answer their inquiries. The team leader was focused on Tony and the life sustaining acts that were being initiated by the two paramedics.
The junior agent couldn’t help but notice the blood that covered Gibbs’ hands. He knew that it was Tony’s blood and that realization unnerved him. As the ambulance was getting ready to leave with Tony and the young girl that they had rescued, Gibbs managed to quickly inform them as to what had happened, but McGee had the feeling that the former Marine was not being entirely honest with them.
He and Ziva had assured Gibbs that they could process the crime scene without him, knowing that he needed to be at the hospital with Tony. They had spent the better part of the afternoon along with Jimmy Palmer trying to find the missing pieces of the puzzle. Unfortunately, the puzzle that they had put together did not result in a beautiful picture; instead, the picture was a collage of blood and gunfire resulting in Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo barely clinging to life.
“We better get this evidence to Abby,” McGee suggested.
“There is not that much to process. It is abundantly clear what happened,” Ziva snapped.
“It is?”
“Yes.”
“Care to enlighten me since you’ve obviously given this some thought?”
McGee heard Ziva sigh. As she turned to face him, he could sense the myriad of emotions churning inside her; he could easily empathize with the Mossad officer, he was trying to get a handle on his own feelings. Anger, confusion, and worry, were their constant companions now and would be until they were able to talk with Gibbs.
“Tony and Gibbs managed to cut off the suspects,” Ziva began. “The kidnappers then opened fired on them. Tony was obviously hit, but he apparently still managed to kill one of them and Gibbs shot the other one.”
He rolled his eyes. “Ziva, that sounds exactly like what Gibbs told us.”
“Yes it does.”
“But you’re not buying that?”
Ziva shook her head. “McGee, you are a trained investigator, are you not?”
“Yeah,” he said.
“As am I.”
“Ziva, what are you getting at?”
“There are too many questions left unanswered.”
“Such as?”
McGee was trying not to wither under Ziva’s intense glare. “Do not try and play the stool McGee,” she warned.
“You mean fool,” he instinctively corrected.
“Whatever. You know what I am talking about.”
He nodded, inadvertently blowing out a pent up breath. “Yeah, I know and you’re right.”
“Why did they not have their protective vests on?”
“I don’t know. Maybe there wasn’t time,” he suggested, a hint of hopefulness in his voice.
“They could have taken the time before they got in the car,” Ziva reasoned. “And how do you explain Tony getting shot in the back?”
“Maybe the second perp shot him when he was taking down the first one.”
“I do not think so. The measurements and sketches tell another story.”
“What do you think happened?” McGee nervously asked.
“I think Gibbs shot Tony.”
McGee tightly clenched his jaw. Ziva had uttered the very words that he had been afraid to speak. He had developed his suspicions after snapping the photos of the crime scene, but had elected to keep his findings to himself. Evidently, Ziva had done the same thing.
“It had to be an accident,” McGee replied, defending the man that he considered to be his mentor.
“Of course it was an accident,” Ziva agreed. “I am just not sure how Gibbs accidentally shooting one of his team will be viewed by…others.”
“We need to talk to Gibbs.”
“Before we talk to anyone else,” Ziva added.
McGee nodded. “All right, we’ll take the evidence to Abby and then go to the hospital.”
“Not a word to anyone.”
“Not even to Abby?”
“You can tell Abby of our suspicions, but no one else.”
McGee knew that Gibbs had to be carrying a heavy load of guilt upon his shoulders. He hoped for the team leader’s sake that he was wrong, but his gut was telling him otherwise. “If Gibbs did shoot Tony…” McGee couldn’t finish his thought.
“I know, McGee. I know,” Ziva whispered.
The two agents got out of the truck, collected the boxes of evidence, and made their way to Abby’s lab. With the exception of a couple of agents asking them if they had heard anything about how Tony was doing, their journey to the lab was uneventful. As they entered the lab, the first thing that he and Ziva noticed was that the usual blaring music that Abby preferred had been replaced by the softer sounds of jazz. They exchanged worried glances. “Abby?” McGee called out.
She came walking out of her office, wiping away the tears as they fell down her cheeks. McGee sat the box of evidence down and walked over to her. “Abby, are you all right?”
“No,” Abby replied as she began to pace. “I’m not all right. Tony’s been shot and I’m stuck here processing evidence. I need to be at the hospital.”
“There’s nothing you can do there, Abby,” he pointed out. “At least here you can stay busy and keep your mind off…”
“Off of what, McGee? How am I supposed to keep my mind off of Tony? I need to be there for him and for Gibbs. Gibbs must be going out of his mind!”
McGee placed his hands on the Goth’s shoulders, forcing her to stand still and listen to him. Convinced that he had her attention, he knew that he had to tell her about what they had pieced together from the crime scene. Abby had a special bond with the team leader and the last thing McGee wanted to do was to say or do anything that would destroy that relationship.
“Abby,” he nervously began. “Ziva and I have something to tell you.”
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
He sensed someone approaching him. Jethro Gibbs looked up from where he was sitting to discover the young lady that he and Tony had just rescued a few hours ago. Sarah Carpenter was the daughter of Major Thomas Carpenter. Sarah had been a witness to the murder of a marine and had been kidnapped to prevent her from testifying. There was no doubt in Gibbs’ mind that she would end up dead, just like Shannon and Kelly, and he was not about to let that happen. He was determined to spare her father the same grief that he had suffered. Finding Sarah became his top priority and his team blindly followed him on yet another self destructive path, trying to make sure that he didn’t cross the fine line of justice once again.
“Agent Gibbs,” she shyly greeted.
“Sarah, how are you?” he asked, his voice betraying his weariness.
“I’m fine. Just a few bruises, here and there,” Sarah replied. “I was waiting on my dad to come and pick me up and I saw you just sitting over here all alone; I thought I would come over and thank you for finding me. You rescued me just in time. They were going to…”
Gibbs stood up and with his calloused thumb, wiped away Sarah’s tears. “I know. I’m glad you’re all right. You just go home and enjoy being a teenager.”
“I will,” she promised. “As a matter of fact, I plan on going to the mall tomorrow. I think that I can get a major shopping spree out of this ordeal,” she teased.
The former Marine grinned. “I bet you can.”
“I…uh…also want to tell you that I know that Agent DiNozzo got hurt because of me and I’ll never be able to repay him for…”
“Agent DiNozzo was doing his job. He wasn’t hurt because of you.” He was hurt because of my carelessness, Gibbs silently mused. “He wouldn’t want you blaming yourself for any of this,” he continued, knowing that he would be carrying enough guilt for the both of them.
“Someday when he’s feeling better, I’d like to thank him,” Sarah said.
“I’m sure he’d like that.”
“We’ll be in touch. I’m sure that my father will insist on a commendation for you and Agent DiNozzo.”
“That won’t be necessary. Just knowing that you’re going to get the chance to finish growing up is all the reward that we need,” he assured her.
Sarah stood on her toes and placed a kiss on Gibbs’ cheek. “Thanks again.”
“You’re welcome.”
Gibbs watched her as she went back inside to wait for her father. After Sarah was out of sight, he glanced at his watch and realized that almost another two hours had passed. He needed to get back inside, but part of him wasn’t sure that he was ready to face the reality that awaited him. All he wanted to hear was that Tony was going to be all right and he knew that the doctor couldn’t tell him that.
His phone rang and he glanced at the caller ID. It was Duck. “Gibbs.”
“Jethro, they are moving Tony to recovery and Dr. Winesett is on his way up here and he wants to talk to you.”
“I’m on my way.”
Gibbs hung up the phone and began making his way up to the waiting area. He was a few minutes away from learning if he had ruined Tony’s life forever; a thought that was becoming harder and harder to live with. If he was having a hard time accepting the possibility, how would DiNozzo react? Would Tony think that his life wasn’t worth living if he couldn’t walk?
He had to force those thoughts out of his mind. Gibbs knew that he needed to have a clear head when he talked to Dr. Winesett. Until Tony could make his own decisions, he was responsible for the young man and it was a responsibility that he took very seriously. He silently vowed that no matter what the outcome, Tony would not have to face the future alone.
Chapter End Notes:
Thank you for the overwhelming response to this story. Hope you enjoy the next post and have a great holiday weekend.