SUNDAY
Tony woke to the smell of bacon. He had gone to bed early, but he now felt he had still over slept the sun seemed much too high in the sky for it to be early morning. After his morning routine he headed down stairs. There was a plate of eggs, bacon, and toast on the table waiting for him.
“They missed you last night.” Jackson as he put a hot cup of coffee down beside Tony’s plate.
Tony nodded. “I just needed some time. Thanks for breakfast, by the way.” Tony said, digging in.
“You are going to have to come back so George can clean you out. He says he won’t play favorites next time.”
Tony smiled and nodded. “I look forward to it.”
Jackson sighed. “You could have called. That was a long way to come to get an answer you already knew.”
“I couldn’t ‘visit’ with a phone call. Besides, I just wanted to get OUT of D.C., away from it all. And like you said, Gibbs...Leroy needs to know. I know that. I just…Nothing happened. I just want to make sure I wasn’t doing this out of spite.”
“I’m not understanding you, Tony.” Jackson replied. “I don’t get about the spite….”
“Nothing happened, Jack. Nothing happened, that is going to be their argument.” Tony said, finishing his breakfast and drinking his coffee.
“It’s not a good one. You have every right to be angry. Sure, they may not take it seriously because nothing happened. But the fact remains, it could have.”
Tony still looked unconvinced.
“Okay. Let me put it to you this way. When you were a beat cop, did you carry your gun on every call you went out on?”
Tony, of course, nodded yes.
“Why?” Jack reasoned. “Statistically the number of your calls involving guns was low, right?”
“Right.” Tony agreed, unsure where Jack was headed with this.
“So, following that logic then, you pick and choose the cases where you needed to bring your gun along.”
“Doesn’t work that way, Jack, I had no way of knowing which cases those were. We arrived on the scene with little or no information sometimes. I also didn’t know what variables would come into play out there. Things could change in an instant.” Tony explained.
“Exactly, Tony. When they turned off that radio they had no idea if something was going to happen to you. Just because you were walking around a nice, residential neighborhood, which it sounds like you were, guarantees nothing. They need to be made to understand that.”
Tony sighed. “I feel like a little boy running to daddy saying that my little brother and sister stole my toy truck from me.”
“This is your life, Tony, not a game. Not for me, not for Leroy, not your friends and family, the people who love you. This is deadly serious. We all could have been going to a funeral this week.” Jackson explained.
That statement brought everything into sharp focus for Tony. He was angry and Jackson was right. He DID have every right to be angry. They were playing with his life. It was not a game he had wanted to participate in. It was not one he started, but he figured he had every right to finish it and tip the deck in his favor while he was at it.
“These people, Tim and Ziva, they have hurt you. You admitted that they hurt you and they have lost your trust.” Jackson stated. “They have to be held accountable. They have to earn your trust again and they have to make up for the hurt.”
“I don’t know how to do that, exactly.” Tony admitted.
“Well, first of all, you let Leroy nail their asses to the wall.” Jackson said, smiling.
Tony looked at him.
“You meant ass. It’s okay. You could have said it.” Jack explained. “As for the rest, it will take time for you to get over the hurt, Tony, and it will take time for you to be able to trust them again.”
“I can’t afford that kind of time, Jackson. We face danger daily. I can’t be wondering if they will have my six or not.”
Both men sat quietly for a few moments, then Tony spoke. “Thanks, Jackson. I have a lot to think about on the flight back home. I have to go up and get ready to go. I…I want to thank you, for everything.”
“I don’t feel like I did a whole hell of a lot, Tony.”
“You did, Jack, you acted just like a grandpa should. I needed an ‘ear’ and understanding and you gave me both. I thank you, again, for that.” With that Tony got up and headed upstairs.
Tony came back down 30 minutes later. He put his bag down and drew Jackson into a hug. “I’ve got to get to the airport to make my flight on time. I guess…I’ll see you soon.” Tony promised.
Jackson smiled. “I’ll have to make a surprise trip to D.C. to see how Leroy’s treating you.”
“I look forward to it, Grandpa.” Tony said, breaking the hug. He picked up his bag.
Jackson again put on a huge grin. He followed Tony to the door and watched him get in his car. “You come back anytime you want. Don’t wait for an invitation.”
Tony nodded and smiled. He waved as he drove off, heading for the airport.
Author's Chapter Notes:
Tony comes to terms with what happened, in a way.
Chapter End Notes:
I felt Tony should have told Gibbs, but I do think he would have probably felt like he was 'tattling' when he did it, but, so what.