Chapter Two
As Gibbs entered the home that he had shared with Shannon and Kelly, it hit him all over again. He ached for his dead wife and daughter, and he couldn’t comprehend how he had learned to live without them for fifteen years, but he must have. The proof was all around him. This wasn’t some elaborate scam. He’d seen the proof that so much time really had passed in the mirror, on the television while he was in the hospital, and he could see it now in his empty house. Shannon and Kelly were gone, and nothing could change that fact.
Gibbs ascended the stairs and headed to the master bedroom. When he opened the door and entered, he got another shock. He had forgotten that he had closed the room off. The mattress was bare and there were boxes stacked all over the room. He then remembered that after Shannon had been killed, he hadn’t been able to force himself to sleep in the bed he had shared with her for so many years. He had boxed all her things up and stored them in here. He couldn’t bear to see her things all over the house, but he couldn’t bear to part with any of them either. He had moved all his own things to the guest bedroom and had slept in there ever since he lost her.
He left the master bedroom, closing it off to the world once again. He went to the guest bedroom and let himself in. He didn’t remember much about this room, but it was clearly his. The bed was neatly made and the colors were ones he would have chosen. The room seemed to be smaller than he recalled, and then he noticed a new closet had been built at one end of the room. There was also another door that he didn’t remember. He reached under the bed and pulled out a duffle bag that he remembered was there. He had always kept one under his bed since he joined the Marines. He tossed the duffle bag on the bed and then he crossed the room and opened the door that hadn’t been there before, seeing that it was an en suite bathroom.
As he looked around the room, he had fleeting images of him and someone else working in here. He couldn’t see the person’s face, but that person obviously had to be close to him because he was territorial when it came to his house and he hadn’t ever permitted anyone to help him with any projects around the house other than his deceased wife. He entered the room and looked in the medicine cabinet over the sink, with the intent of gathering some of his things to pack. He didn’t think he could remain in DC near all those people who expected him to be the way he was before. He could barely remember any of them, and they all wanted too much from him.
As he looked in the medicine cabinet, he saw several things that he knew were his, but he also saw many things he knew beyond a doubt that he would never buy for himself. There was top-of-the-line mouthwash and toothpaste, along with a cheaper brand he knew he favored, as well as shaving cream he didn’t think he would ever use. He got the image of a man with his back to him, wearing a forest-green robe, carrying out his nightly routine at the sink. He didn’t know who it was, though he felt he should know. He felt it in his gut that this person was very important to him.
Gibbs wished he could turn back time and change the events of the past several days. He was so frustrated with his memory. He felt he was missing something, or someone, very important, but his fragmented memory just couldn’t grasp it.
He abandoned the medicine cabinet and walked over to the overly large shower and pulled back the shower curtain. There were also several things in there that he knew he would never own. He may have lost the last fifteen years of his life, but he knew himself well enough to know he would never buy the expensive shampoo, conditioner, and body wash that were in the shower caddy for himself. He turned around and saw a towel rack. The towels were thick and luxurious, much more expensive than he would ever buy. He touched one of the towels in order to feel its texture, and was surprised to find it warm. On further inspection, he discovered the towels were stacked on a heated towel rack, another thing he would never have invested in.
On turning to leave the room, he could see two expensive-looking robes hanging on the back of the door. One was a dark sky-blue, the other forest-green, the same color of the robe the man was wearing in the brief image he had seen in his mind earlier when he entered the room. He glanced at the counter next to the sink and saw several hair care products that he knew for certain weren’t his. He wouldn’t get caught dead putting hair gel or mousse in his hair.
Gibbs gave up on the idea of packing right now, and decided to explore his house. Maybe he could figure out who this mysterious person was that seemed to live in his home with him. He felt it was very important to figure that out as soon as possible.
He went back into the bedroom and took a really good look around. He saw a picture on the nightstand. He went over and picked it up. It was a picture of him and his senior field agent, DiNozzo. They each had an arm around the other’s shoulder and were looking at the camera. They both had smiles on their faces.
Gibbs couldn’t comprehend being in a relationship with a man. When he was first in the Corps, he had exchanged a few hand and blow jobs with the other recruits, but that had just been for relief of tension. He had never been in a serious relationship with any of them. He then met Shannon when he was home on leave and never looked at another man in that way again, at least as far as he could remember.
By all accounts he had moved on from losing Shannon and Kelly and had even remarried three times, according to what Jenny had told him while he was in the hospital, but as he stood there looking at the picture, he finally recalled each of the women he had married, and then divorced. He didn’t think he had truly been in love with any of them. With his memory loss, he was able to look at those relationships more objectively, and now he thought he was probably just trying to replace his dead wife with a look-a-like. And while each of the women he married superficially resembled Shannon, they could never, ever truly replace her. It was no wonder each of those marriages had imploded.
Gibbs replaced the picture on the nightstand and went over to the closet. He could see that the original small closet had been enlarged and another door added, so that it took up the entire wall of the bedroom. He inspected the new portion of the closet and could tell from the workmanship and style that he had built it himself. He closed his eyes and he could remember himself and his second-in-command, Tony, working on the closet. He remembered now that when they were alone, he called him Tony, not DiNozzo. These memories lead to the realization that he spent a lot of time alone with Tony.
Gibbs was very encouraged by this. He knew the memories he lost were still there, somewhere inside his head, just waiting to be grasped. He hoped if he worked at it, he could recapture what he now knew he had lost in that explosion.
TBC
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